I have just attended Spencer and Stef's Wedding..


And i am truly amazed at how creative they are.. They printed their photos on stamps and its absolutely gorgeous.

Its always nice to see the rest of the ppl all dressed up at weddings. I saw many that i havent seen for ages, and to be frank, its really nice to see them.

Irregardless of what happened in the past, its really a nice feeling to see everyone there.


I realised that i have taken a more peaceful way of handling things. Of cos, there are a few that i have not much to talk to.. but, I still tried my best to talk to them.. Maybe its just i havent seen them for a long time.. heh heh..


The day started as early as 530am.. monster woke up and prepared.. and he woke me up as well.. I didnt want to go cos carol, katt and Maureen all gotten the same dress and shoes.. I didnt want to spend anymore so i gave it a miss..


Me continued to slp until about 9.. and i woke up went back as my mom was out of town.. I needed to be back to do the chores.. My blood nearly boiled when i opened my door.. The whole place was in a mess and stinky! So i spent the whole morning tidying up, washing clothes, wash the dishes, etc..


And the second half of the day, i was practically lazing on my bed wondering what to wear to the dinner.. I decided not to wear too formal as it was held at a restaurant.. who knowss... I am the most casual there.. -_-

But i enjoyed myself there.. hee..


After wards was clubbing at st james with the whole lot of ppl.. wasnt really keen on going as my feets are tired.. haha.. but been a long time since the whole lot of us went.. =)

Stupid monster went off walking around by himself.. Yes i was partying away.. But i was so tired.. wanted to leave.. and i couldnt find him.. to make things worse, my phone is not working.. Imagine my frustration..

Its was raining super heavily so i was trapped inside.. and i went around roaming, managed to catch him walking around aimlessly.. I told him i was quite frustrated.. How can he just walk away.. and he said he was feeling tired as well, so he went around looking for a place to sit..

So in the end, we all decided to go back..

Had a long talk with him.. He says i need to give him room for mistakes.. and i was like.. huh?? Did i not?? If i did not, i would have walked out.. Does giving room for others' mistakes means that i cannot be angry by what they do?

He said last time Cindy would go out to search for him, and walk quietly behind his back like a xiao nu ren.. For me, i need to find out what is the reason behind whatever he is doing before i decide if i should follow suit..

Ya, This i have to agree.. I am someone who do not like the feeling of not knowing what i am doing.. Maybe i am a control freak.. I make sure everything is organized properly..

So its irritating.. But, i am not angry..

Maybe i should learn to take a more relaxed manner to life.. Haha.. Everything bo chup!!

I think i will be happier that way.. =)

Also, after talking to him.. I realised that there's something about me that i dont like.. But i just cant put my finger to it.. I actually miss the navive and innocent side of myself.. and I forgotten about the basic rule..

I used to believe that if i can make everyone i care happy, i would be happy too..

Maybe, i am just missing this part......

I am blogging in my office!!! =)

Alot has been on my mind recently..

Work stuffs.. Family stuffs.. bf stuffs.. even friends..


I guess i am still rather bothered by the things going on betw me and pu.. No doubt we met up after the incident, but i knew instantly, things are different.. No more hugs from him.. No more concern from him..

I actually regretted meeting him.. bcos now i know, how much i hurt him and how much is left for our friendship..

Maybe i shouldnt even mentioned abt wat he said to me to anyone.. Mayb i should just keep everything to myself.. Mayb i am too selfish.. At that point, I just felt suffocated that i need to tell those who are close to me.. oh well..

We talked over at msn last week.. he's friendly and all.. but maybe too friendly that it seems alittle weird.. I am not being paranoid.. I just know him too well thats all..


Aside for that.
Last week... I only worked for 1 and a half days!! haha.. Monday.. and then tuesday (supposed to work the whole day) but.. I was coughing badly.. my boss told me to go off..

I did not want to take advantage of the fact that my boss is so kind, so i took a half day leave..

Dinner was out with nigel cs and hc.. DAMN long nv see hc!! haha.. after dinner was chilling at haagen daz.. then me and hc went to look for monster since its near his place.. the guys talked while i ate my ribena sweets.. lol..

All the way till 2 am??!! or 3? i forgot.. after which, monster and me took a cab back to my place.. bcos its the start of our long weekend!

.Wednesday

Slept till quite late.. initial plan was to go swimming.. but last minute he had to go for an interview, so it was quite rush.

We went to buy our ingredients and started cooking!

Cooking was always fun.. but cleaning is always a pain.. so we did all we can to prevent my kitchen from getting oily.. haha..

At night, i stayed at home.. spending time with my mom.. while waiting for him to be back..

.Thursday

We went back to SP!! brought QiaoYu there as she is not working as well..

But i was disappointed! cos its orientation week.. i cant eat the chicken chop.. =(

After which, we went back to his place.. and slept! all the way till evening.

Went to Kallang with Hanwei and Qiaoyu to catch Shinjuku Incident..

I like the show alot! not bcos its bloody and gory.. but i feel the deeper meaning behind the story..

sick n sick.. since last friday till today.. ate my pills and fell aslept immediately.

.Friday

Good Friday to everyone who celebrates it...

This date is also me and monster's anniversary! We didnt really celebrate it... oh.. he got me a stalk of sunflower!! and i mean a stalk.. i have been wanting someone to give me tt.. bcos i simply love carrying a stalk of sunflower.. haha.. and well, this time i am surprised..

anyway, the day was spent with his whole family rather than the two of us.. we all went to offer praying to his grandpa..

Along the way, there are some misunderstandings.. i just feel so irritated.. but i kept quiet.. after which, went over to vivo for tea.. can you imagine about 20 plus ppl making noise at toast box.. lol.. i think we kind of created some chaos there..

initial plan was to catch a movie, however, no slots, no suitable movies (got to be PG rating).. So we all decided to go over his uncle's place...

caught the uncut version of wolverine.. i wanna watch tt show when it screens! =)

.Saturday

woke up rather late... had lunch with his sis and bf.. supposed to go down to town and catch a movie with them..

But maybe due to our poor time management, we couldnt.. and bcos of some incidents, he was in a really foul mood.. cursing and swearing while driving.. I dont know.. this is something that i really dont like.. so, yup.. i kept quiet... AAAAaallll the wayyy...

back home and had dinner.. i think both of us just feel suffocated cos we arent talking to each other.. and besides, he just have a stupid mouth that he will say sth really sarcastic when he's pissed. So there i was, tearing when eating my bowl of fish noodles.. To the extent that i lost all appetite to eat.. He too, stop eating..

So the both of us went over to a quiet spot to talk things out.. I said something bad..

I said i was tired.. since he is tired too.. why not take a break? Time off each other.. then maybe we will be clear headed to deal with each other then...

At that point of time, i really mean it.. I cried too.. But somehow i know i meant it.. bcos maybe we just need to give each other time to see if we are asking too much from either side..

I caused his tears to roll down.. and it ended up me comforting him.. We managed to sort out our differences and ended up at cold storage to buy chicken soup for the whole family to drink..

Maybe sometimes when you treasure a r/s, you want to make it work so badly.. that unknowingly, you create stress for each other..

I have learnt many things from him.. I was never a person that was able to openly speak my mind to my bf.. There are a few things that i would choose not to say for fear of creating another wave of unhappiness..

But ironically, i always wanted my partner to be one whom we are completely honest and open about our feelings.. Although, many ppl claimed that they can do that.. But, have you ever heard from your partner saying that he feels sad when he looks at his ex-gf photo and feel its so wasted that things dont work out betw them..

Dont be mistaken.. I am not trying to complain about him.. The fact is, i appreciate that he came clean with me.. and bcos of that, i am not angry and i understood his situation then.. So what i am trying to bring across is the extent of how honest we are to each other.. We tell each other almost everything.. of cos not to the extent that "i am bathing now, i am brushing my teeth.." But we keep each other updated on what goes on in our lives and most imptly what is on our mind.

I used to have this thing about my bf not telling me that other girls are flirting with them.. other girls try to do something funny to him.. well, what most guys think is that they wouldnt want additional trouble from their partner just by telling them.. But have they even realised that its bcos of wat they hide that will eventually cause the relationship to turn sour..

Girls, yes, we all do feel uneasy, jealous and unhappy, its human nature to think that way.. I myself will feel that way too, i dont deny that.. But take time to appreciate his courage to tell you.. it is not easy.. bcos most guys will tend to choose the easy way out.. Monster is different.. If he knows by telling me, i would be unhappy.. He would still tell me.

Ok.. alot of crap from me.. But well, i am happy we talked things out..

.Sunday

Since sat was spoiled by him.. so we made it up on sunday.. we went to town for a short walk.. and also to get his leather shoes.. afterwards was dinner at my place.. and we watched devil loves prada or sth.. not a bad show..

.Today

Back at work.. and i have tons to do.. bcos i have been off for 5 days!!! ggrrrr....
My email counter grew to a whooping 235 mails.. i nearly jumped out of my skin..
My Lappy's mother board gave way.. so whole morning was trying to transfer my stuffs to a temporary PC.. and it is damn slow! -_-

Still sick.. my colleagues are pestering me to go home.. haha.. BUT.. i cant.. bcos i have alot of work to clear!!!

Ciaos... Till then..

haiz haiz haiz....

I lost all motivation to work!! I skipped work today...

Sometimes, i just wish i am rich, so i need not be bothered about work..

arrr... Ppl please help me....


Something really unpleasant happened at work last friday. Although, it seems like i didnt bother.. I just feel that there are too many things going on behind our back.. and i dont like it at all!!

The reason (or so as i see it) that they wanted to push me up to manage the sales ppl... its bcos they wanted me to do sales eventually.. just bcos i managed to bring in some sales over the few mths i am here..

And they wanted to get rid of all the engineers... they say i am lucky cos at least i have a new job allocated to me... i say BULL SHIT!!

They just want to cut cost... and believe naively that singapore can make do without the engineers... meaning they are going to let manila and india site take over all our job roles..

crap... who is going to do the gatekeeping of the work system.. to think that i always put myself into the bad light, cos i always quarrel with the sales manager due to his neglience of the proper work flow.. and i insist things should be done the proper way...

so.. without sg engineer, manila and india team can do it? my ass...

The thing that really drove me mad is that all these was not told to us.. and its the decision of the few managers.. my VP didnt even know... so much of the transparency being boasted about... so much of the respect being talked about...

If you respect ppl, wouldnt you even discuss with us first? how am i going to explain to my order admins if one day they just decided to cut them....

I just feel so siannnn that i really cant find any reason to work..... haiz..... i hate politics... i hate fighting with the management... sucks...


After work was meeting up with cs and nigel at jp.. for dinner.. guess its a long time since we met ba.. cos there are times when there are some silence.. LOL... typical me, i just cannot leave my work in the office.. so, i wasnt really in the mood to talk..

Overall was a nice meet up.. both still the same.. still as ever crappy.. haha..


Friday is just a terrible day over all!! i just couldnt control myself.. i was really very moody when i met up with monster.. tt sweet guy came over to mrt to fetch me and knew instantly that something was bothering me.. I am just in my feisty mood.. so i guess i did pissed him off a little..


I HATE MY JOB...... it doesnt pays well.. it caused stress in my life.. i am always playing mental games there... sucks! totally sucks..

I did a really stupid thing..... -_-

Weeks ago, i started thinking about the perfect gift for monster's birthday. I know i know, i am really very kiasu.. cos his birthday is still more than 2 mths away.

I was planning to take him away for a short trip. And he had the exact same plan to do so on our anniversary which is about 1 mth before his birthday....

So i came up with all sorts of excuses why we shouldnt go.. haha..

Last week i was working from work for almost the whole week.. Haha.. I know.. damn good of my boss!! haha..

So I was planning to bring him to a resort, have a spa, relax by the beach... Because he had been working really very hard, almost all the saturdays he was working.. and he is always complaining about his backache, so i tot of a trip just to relax, get ourselves out from the busy citys.

So i decided on phuket! All expenses proudly sponsered by me.. cost a bomb.. but he deserve a nice trip..

I found a resort that has rooms just next to the pool. The kind that you can jump into the water from your room.. =)

I booked the resort... and i was really excited..

I even tot of how i will surprise him..

Initially, i tot of telling him the night before.. but.. thats a problem as there wont be any time for him to prepare...

so.. Finally, i tot that i will draft out a letter saying that he won a trip to phuket and mail it to his place the week before...


BUT!!

stupid me.. i blurted everything out to him the next day i met him........ -_-""""

Reason being? I am just too excited...


Call me stupid or wat...

I found out that it is really not easy to be an office lady. And to be frank, i am not those who likes to doll up myself, so i find dressing to work a real hassle. Still, i managed to dress in the most casual office wear you can ever imagine. Haha...
I must say, i really kind of miss the time in ITS, working shift and all. Now the straight hours 9-6 is making me very tired. Well, of cos there are times when i knock off real early like 1pm?? and there are also time where i worked til 10 at night, with no ot pay!!!

I have been working till almost 10 recently and i am beginning to feel my body giving up. I cant concentrate whenever i am off work, which makes it difficult to meet up with my frens and monster.

Unknowingly, i let myself get caught in the politics between the management and the sales ppl. My boss wants me to move up and manage the sales ppl, while my VP wants me to stay put and wants the sales ppl to move down. I seriously cant be bothered if i move up or down, bcos either way that means i have more workload. My boss promised a pay rise.

But you see, the problem is that, at my current state, i cant even finish the things on my hand. I know i got to streamline the work flow. But, i just do not have the time. Monster said that its good that my boss think highly of me, cos i just joined a bare 4 mths.

This 4 mths really made me so tired.. There is no one who can take over my job if i am away. So thats why they gave me a laptop, to bring the work home to do.. -_- damn.. even on holidays and weekends, i had to spare out some time to clear emails and attend to important matters. It is not a good feeling.

Just wondering who long can i do this... haha..


On a side note, this year is the first Valentine's day for monster and me!! Nothing to be excited about, except the fact that i am so happy that he shared the same view as me abt this day. So we didnt get anything for each other nor did we waste our money on some expensive restaurant. Its just the two of us spending quality time together.

It started the night before when i went over his place. As usual, he just likes to tell me whatever he was thinking. So there he goes, ranting about how he wanted to give me a surprise, buying roses for me and bringing it to the bus stop that i always alights. So the key point is, he "wanted" Well, since he didnt, i told him not to. Bcos the flowers are unbelievably expensive that day.

We went to the supermarket to shop for some groceries and while paying, he disappeared. No need to guess, yes, he went to get one stalk of white rose for me. Haha.. Although it was nothing special, but i was very happy and i felt his heart. He told me that every girl deserves to get at least a stalk of flower on v day. Just a small gesture warmed my heart.

I dont know.. Mayb it could be because its him.. I have guys spending alot of money on me before, buying things i like, etc. But i really do not need all these. I can afford to buy whatever i want, i just need to feel that you care and thats enough. And i am proud to say that, my monster did the bare minimum which means i made the right choice. haha.

So the next day, he was on standby as it was valentine's day, all his colleagues were busy. So he went to attent a case in the morning after which he brought me to eat my fav lor mee!!!!! haha.. I have been craving for weeks, so i begged him to bring me there on valentine's day. Ha.. We brought some home for his family and spent the rest of day slacking at home. We talked and watched movies.
At night, was out at boiler partying with our frens. Its been such a long time since i partied. Wasnt very keen on going, as i didnt want to waste my money on such activities anymore, but since everyone's going, we went. They spinned r&b and retro. The retro was so much better than zouk. Every wed is retro night at boiler. So ppl... please head down to boiler if you enjoy retro.. haha.. and i realised, i still love dancing after all. I missed dancing and i so wanted to get into a dance school, but its just a dream...

went back his place and the white rose was blooming really nicely. It was so beautiful that i couldnt stop touching and commenting about it.

And so it is.. our valentine's day.. simple and nice...

oh.. recently, i spotted a coin purse and a bag from Loewe that i absolutely love!!! I showed the girls yesterday and they all said that it is very nice.. Monster is trying to get me to change my mind.. cos its not very cheap. Haha.... I am still thinking.. lol..
and, i just want to say this.. I am disappointed with LV... i went into their shop and i found out that their standard dropped! Their leather is no longer like last time and is no where compared to Loewe's and Chanel's. I wanted to get the speedy bag, but decided to drop it as it turned out to be quite ugly...

So i will still stick to my fav.. loewe.. =))

I want to say this !!!!

I finally muster enough courage to do my first brazillian waxing!!!!!!!! haha...
disocunt coupon proudly sponsored by yenling.. lol...

It was freaky... but i just went for it... haha...

Mayb i would be brave enough to overcome my fear of pain then i could get my first tattoo tt i have been wanting to get for years and years.... dreaming again..

Anyway, sweet sweet lz did the eiffel tower for me... nicey..

My mom has been away for a week already... happily touring in korea while i work so hard here.. haha.. it really feels weird to be without her for so many days..

Sweet bf came over to acc me whenever he is free... buutt... kind of have a disagreement with him... actually more like he really pissed me off..

We sort things out in the end.. so i guess its good..

Besides tt, i started my new job... i am realli starting to feel stress... seriously... the ppl there are workaholics... they do ot like nobody's biz... its only my third week there... and i cant seems to clear finish my emails and pending things... -_-"' and i have to bring my lappy home to work, in case of last minute mattes i have to settle..
Now i know what they say executives positions comes with a price... faintz...

its been a long time since i met up wif my frens... i think my life is god damn boring now.. shit ass..

Happy Birthday to myself!!!! Hohoho..

This year its simple but nice.. bcos its my first birthday wif bf..
On the eve of my birthday is my last day with Schering-Plough! Yeay.. not tt i really totally hate my job.. but happy that i am moving on closer to my goal.. and so, i have 4 days free from work! yeay..

I was busy doing my clearance for the whole day.. and feeling quite emo... i dont know why.. lol.. so when i talked to him, i was a little pms-ing.. and he started to ask anything to update him? did i go out of my company? It was a little weird, bcos i dont normally go out of my company.. so i sensed something fishy...... until he blurted out that he actually send flowers to my company for me... He was afraid that he receptionist forgot to call and i went off without it..

........................... i was speechless.. i didnt know how to react.. bcos its the first time anyone did tt for me.. i even ask the guys how ar how ar.. so embarrassing.. so in the end, i dragged ah hui to the guard house with me.. and turns out they send it to the recep.. so i had to make my way there..

It was a really pretty bonquet of sunflowers.. my fav!! and plus a teddy bear.. i was blushing like hell as i make my way back to office.. everyone is looking at me.. i am a happy girl! hahaha..

went home and down to zouk to party.. ppl who went are mi, bf, agnes, zhen, charl, hc, yl, marcus, sam, veron, dill, crist, auntie, hq, shirun.... the zouk wasnt as good as last time.. i was disappointed.. seriously, its the last time i'm going back.. and by the time i arrived there, i cant get into phuture.. but, i manage to smuggle in with agnes, with the help of dill hoho..

The next day, which is my birthday! i ko till late afternoon? lol.. he brought me to a thai restaurant located at clover way... not a very classy restaurant, but they serve damn gooood thai food.. and i am loving it!! the plus point is that its not expensive at all. The two of us ordered 7 dishes.. costing us onli 40... nice heh heh..

we went back my place to rest as the next day we are going johor! hee.. so the whole day we were at jb.. shopping.. eating.. came back before dinner time... cos my mom's bringing us out to eat...

sat, accompanied him to work then i met charmaine up for dinner and passed her present.. hee.. and its home sweet home..

today, off to bugis, bought some office wear.. then to hanwei's place.. cos qiaoyu's cooking dinner.. then back at home now..

I'm starting my new job tml! excited.. the only thing i hate is that i got to wear office attire and got to dress up.. siannnn... no choice... got to get use to it.. hee... wish myself luck! =)

bf can be quite funny sometimes...

today.. i talked to him on the phone..

he's telling me that he has headache.. a little hangover cos he went out wif his squat mates ytd to drink..

and then i was asking him " ohh.. u drank alot ytd night?"

and this was his reply... " oohh... no la.. not alot.. i drank alot of nic and beer...."

-_-""""

i guess he must be really having a hangover.. muahahahaha...

opppss.. its been abt 3 mths since i last updated?? hehe..
its been really busy.. the work is really draining my energy away..
stupid human politics and absurd favoritism..

the three attachments students left so its back to me and ah zhen.. hoho.. everything's still alright.. just that as usual i have a lousy engineer who dont know anything and plus a real irritating girl just transferred into my project. Mayb she's just trying to strike a conversation with me, but i cant help feeling the things she asks are really ridiculous. For example, when ah zhen is sick and on mc, she would ask me how come she on mc. Like duhz.. obviously cos she's sick?? and then when i told her she's sick, having flu.. She asks why she sick? -_-"""""

There's alot of more weird things that she does that i really cannnnnooot understand..
oh.. alot of ppl left the work place already, and they are not hiring new ppl, so the existing ppl have more and more work load... and so i decided its time to move on too!! lol..
hehe.. i am going into my vendor's company as an engineer! hoho..
actually am quite excited to go.. gonna tender next week! =)

Today i called my ex-boss, uncle wang as ah zhen wanna try lab work.. too bad they arent hiring female now.. stupid uncle wang said if i had not gone off, i would have been promoted long time ago.. -_-"" and talked to rebec!! hehe.. i really miss her sia.. and the fobas ppl.. They are having a chalet next week, so rebec's gonna bring mi go! hoho..

alright.. sth exciting this weekend.. hanrong - rh's cousin is gonna get married! and.. qiaoyu - hanrong's wife asks me to be her sisters.. yippee.. i can play tricks on rh and hanwei! hahaha.. evils..

besides that, everything is going on fine.. my bf is good.. he's been really sweet and all.. except when sometimes he dont understand what i toking abt.. and i dont understand what he toking abt.. and we get into a little disputes.. but its always settled nicely..
the past 3 weeks he went to reservist, so that means i can onli see him on the weekends. And finally, end of reservist today!! haha..
I always feel that how come no one seems to appreciate his good.. yes, he might be a little irritating at times and i really feel like strangling him.. but well, tts part of him.. and the most impt thing is... he treat everyone sincerely.. and he really has strong family value.. i like.. haha..

family is good... my relationship wif mom improved.. hehe... i really cant imagine what if one day she's no longer wif mi.. i start to get real emo wif this.. today i was sitting on my company bus and this thing just pop into my mind.. the next moment, my eyes were watery.. i really cant imagine how devastated i would be if tt day comes... zzzzzzzzzz

frens are good too.. more meet up wif the girls.. hehe.. sat bbq session wif my sec sch frens.. but sorry guys i can onli stay for really a short while... heh...

alright now.. everything is good.. so basically i am happy lo.. =p

I am back with the random updates again.. lol.. i will try to update at least once a week.. *no promises though..

I have put on alot of weight!!! i am so sad.. sickening.. eating too much good food.. spending money until i am so broke.. faintz..

ok.. so far life's been ok.. except for work, everything is going quite smoothly..

Work as usual sucks bcos of india's indian.. i am totally speechless towards them.. only one work.. imbecile !! Just last week, i got pissed off by this stupid indian that i cried.. This job really heighten my hatred towards indian.. lol..

These two weeks were packed with activities that i felt drained out of energy.. Weekends were spent wif him of cos.. Last sunday we went to the zoo !!! After which was kungfu panda.. tired but fun day.. Heh..... and thats probably the last time i will see hanwei in dont know how many weeks, cos he's going ns this coming thursday..
no one to fight wif me for a couple weeks....

On a side note, last week he made me angry twice.. not gonna mention the details.. but mayb we still have alot to learn about each other... Its really different turning from good frens to couples.... Well, good thing is that i can be myself in front of him no matter what..

As irritating as he can be, he stills manage to brighten my day....
Do you know the feeling when tt special someone keeps looking at you, smiling to himself....
I know... bcos i caught him doing tt a few times already !!!!! muahahhaha....

He's sweet..... =)

Just back from Mother's Day dinner.. hehe.. This year is alittle different.. Its me, mommy of cos and Dad.. Its been dont know how many years that he came back and have dinner with us..

Initially i was very reluctant to ask him along.. Those who know why should know.. Those who dont.. dont ask.. But well, as long as my mom's happy, i am alright with anything.. and why my brother's not there.. he is just another jackass.. told him long time ago that i will bringing mom for dinner and he just didnt take it.. shit..

Anyway, i took the chance to tell my mom at dinner that i am with rh.. So far her impression of him is still good.. and she told mi that a few months back, my bro actually saw lucas with another girl quite a number of times.. when she knew that i am still in contact wif him, she was quite pissed.. well.. mommy, i am a big girl now.. i know wat to do.. =)

anyway, i finalli meet up wif charmaine after so long!! hehe.. met her at velocity.. i am so mountain turtle.. i actualli got lost there.. unbelievable.. and when i managed to reach velocity.. took us quite a while to locate each other bcos its our first time there.. haha.. updated each other on our lives..

Then rh and hanwei came to fetch us to feng shan market for bak chor mee!! haha.. Supper.. yummi.. ok.. i am glad that charmaine and rh got along quite well.. heh.. =) she's going taiwan this coming tues.. i am so jealous.. haha.. i am going to go next year i dont care!!

on a side note... sweets is going to change job soon.. and if successful, this new job requires him to fly to diff countries frequently, taiwan, barcelona !! can u believe it.. barcelona lo.. i am so jealous lo.. when can i find a job like that.. haha.. ok.. nvm.. in tt way i can get gifts from all these places wahahah.. i am so evil.. =p

long time since i blogged..

some updates on my work stuff.. everything is going on at a super fast pace.. because they want the whole plant to be fully commissioned by the end of march next year.. in case no body know wat i talking about.. i would say its quite impossible to achieve.. so i am actualli quite stressed out.. i might lose my job when this project finishes.. shitty.. all because of the two products that went wrong..

family wise.. everything is ok.. or mayb i am just used to it.. just mi and my mom at home.. occasional appearance of my brother.. he got into the same shit again.. i am just wondering when all these would stop.. because there is no way i can throw down everything and concentrate on my work and studies.. i am having second tots on getting a degree..

anyway.. my life just revolve around work, mom, my dear frens and sweets..
After work would be either out with frens, at home having dinner or just spending time with sweets..
and i tot things were simple.. never did i expect that i would fall for him one day.. I did not expect myself to come out from the past so fast.. or mayb i had long did that.. just that i dont know..
alright.. so there we were listening to a live band and he began his story about him and another girl.. and there i was, listening really hard to wat he has to say when i realised the story was all about mi and him..

He said it takes two hands to clap so if i am willing to take his hand..

I tot of this question over and over again for a long time.. i was afraid that it would spoil our friendship should things go wrong.. But at tt point, i knew he had already taken my heart away.. Still i was too shy to do anything.. so we dragged for the longest time till he sealed my lips with a kiss..

....i melted..


so yea.. i need not say much.. all the while my time was spent with sweets.. He's been really nice and all.. i cant ask for more..

Today wasnt supposed to meet him.. but sweets came over.. i am surprised.. and i just sat in his car talking about our day.. I am a happy girl.. He just manage to do everything so right..

I like the fact that i do not need to talk much to him.. mayb cos we started off as really close frens.. Just having with him around makes me comfortable..



well.. i just cant believe it.. often the very last person u ever tot that u will fall for is just standing right in front..

Things happen unexpectedly.. =)

hehe.. long time since i blog..

Turning rusty.. havent been much lately.. just working n working..
Life's been good so far.. First week without him was a little tough.. but i got over it soon.. so now everything's good..

Basically.. every wed was wala for mi and my "darling" rh.. haha.. just sitting down listening to the band, drinking and talking.. the singer is so darn charming.. haha.. ok thats besides the point.. caught afew midnight movies with him too.. tt kuku actualli fell aslp while watching step up2!! haha..

Other than tt.. i am busy re-organising my room.. buying new furnitures.. and making my room a comfy place to stay in.. my wardrobe just came not long ago.. so excited! haha..

and i finally have my own pc.. i got the old laptop from my bro.. and rh does miracles to u.. so its working now.. thank goodness for him..

last weekend was clubbing at o bar wif agnes charlene and hc.. super fun night wif tons of ppl (an unusual sight). of cos.. some irritating ppl.. but we girls just wanna dance and have fun!!

ok.. my company's facing a difficult situation now.. the shares dropped by alot.. and a few incidents in the plant made things worse.. everyone is tight on the toes now.. so god bless mi..

well well.. other than tt.. everything's good.. i love the life now.. =)
somehow single stil has its pros.. and i am so enjoying it now..

They say a leopard doesnt change its spots..

I totalli agree..

Ytd i made a final decision.. Had a clean cut break with him..

My friends tell mi they saw him outside with some other girls.. not 1 but always diff ones..

I knew i had to just let go..

I am happy i did.. I do not wish to settle for someone like him just bcos i like him..

and i am confident to say my heart is already dead..

I will move on.. =)

Long time since i stepped into here to make a posting..

Yesterday i met up wif Charmaine after so long.. always nice to talk to her..
Went shopping around at JP and met up wif her parents at Esprit..
Tt sweet girl got mi a coach keyring from China.. =)

Anyway, I feeel frustrated at myself.. Nth seems to be right..
Lotsa things to be done yet so little time..

I cant believe i feel this way, the spark betw the both of us is gone.. I dont know what happened..
Mayb we are just too comfortable to improve on the situation..

Had a small talk wif him.. we didnt argue, thankfully..
We are not on cold war or anything but something for us to think about..
Whether we want to improve and continue the r/s or just let it die..

Yesterday i got burnt by the live wire of my hair dryer and tt stupid hair dryer caught fire, short circuited my whole house..
Normally i would be desperately looking for him, and mayb crying to him bcos i am scared..

But it took mi a long time just to pick up the phone and drop him a msg..

I have a feeling that i am starting to keep everything to myself once again.. Its sickening and frustrating that everytime i am the one initiating to improve this r/s.. real tired..

Supposed to meet him today after work.. but i think i will just avoid him.. not intentionally but i need to know wats going on in my mind..

Certainly, he dont feel special to me just before.. and i dont miss him as much as before..

I have one thing to announce!!

My fav twister fries are back!!! hehe.. i just had two big packets of them today.. I am a happy girl.. nvm the fact that i am left all alone at home with nothing to do on sat night.. lol..

ok.. some updates to round up the past few weeks' activities..
This year i received quite a few christmas gifts.. surprisingly..

Company Dnd
Went to my company's DND at Orchard Hotel.. I won the 9th prize! Osim ibike.. lol.. Pu came all the way down just to take a look at the dressed up me.. =) Talked to him awhile, took some pictures and he went for work.. after tt was phuture wif agnes..

Charlene's 21st birthday
Days before i was frantically shopping for her gift and getting sth special for her and zhen. Bought the Limited christmas edition CK's Euphoria parfume for her and 2 Forever Friends cushion for each of us.. and i made brownies for all of them..
Basically fun time spent.. but i realised i can no longer stay up all night like last time.. i ko at around 1 plus for both nights.. so lousy! But anyway i am glad she enjoyed herself. =)

Cousin Gary's wedding
His wedding is so so so romantic!! held at the Swissotel Merchant Court..
and its the first time in like 8 years, i finally saw my Aunt Jane and Uncle John from Wales..
I really missed my aunt alot.. the feeling is so indescribable.. when she embrace mi.. i nearly cried.. She's someone i hold dearly to my heart.. a pity i can only see her once every few years..
I am very sure i meant something to her too.. bcos she gives the special treatment to me only.. hehe.. anyway.. i was like the limelight there.. -_- cos all my aunts havent seen mi for years.. and every single of them was bringing me around to "show off" to their friends..
talked to my Aunt Jane thru out the dinner..
I realli can say i realli realli miss her so so much..
tt day itself i told my mom that i wanna spend christmas with her..

Christmas
spent my christmas eve wif the gang at ktv.. fun.. =) but tired.. haha.. i did last min shopping.. shopping for Aunt Jane, Uncle John, Aunt Anne and my mom's christmas gift..
I got my mom a necklace.
Aunt Anne, a leather jewellery box.
Aunt Jane, i bought a framless photo frame and handmade it.. design it with our photos i took at the wedding.. pity i didnt take a photo of it.. cos everyone said its nice.. =)
Uncle John, a set of belt and buckle.
Christmas day, i went up to Aunt Anne's place with him cos Aunt Jane and Uncle John was staying wif her. My mom and dad were already there. We all had lunch and my boy bought log cake up.

This year,
I got a psp from him..
a box of really nice cookies from dearest charmaine and caiping..
a personalised keychain and a bear tin of famous amos from zhen..
a handmade hp strap and a heart badge from charlene..
a cute mirror from lingzi..
a set of white musk body lotion and shower gel from agnes..
a set of bubble bath and bath salts from simon's wife..
a shit model from edward.. lol..
a miniature christmas tree from huizhen..
a box of chocolates from yan ling..
n of cos..
a set of pearl necklace from my bro..
a red packet from my Aunt Jane and Uncle John..
Thank you everyone.. =)
I of cos did sth for these nice ppl.. handmade.. =)
Got dkny perfume and hanvanians slippers for him..

the Best Christmas gift?
Its that i spent the day wif Aunt Jane and all.. She's gonna leave this coming week.. I think i will cry quite badly.. Its gonna be another 5 or 8 years till i see her again.. She's so sweet.. She told mi to save up on the air tickets to wales, and she will take care of the rest for mi.. even giving mi pocket money to spend there.. and whispering only for mi.. =)
I told myself in my mind.. i am gonna save up.. I am going to wales to look for her in 2009.. (cos 2008 holds alot of vacation for mi already.. Bangkok, Redang and Taiwan!)

New Year 2008
ok.. i went to the SILOSO BEACH PARTY !! with him and charlene..
and it totally rocks.. DJ Shy was real good.. I think singapore clubs should employ her!!
The moment she spins, everyone started crowding round the stage area to dance.. so its from 8 all the way till 1130, we were dancing to her music..
as usual there were lots of black ppl.. and crazy stunning ppl.. and this irritating guy who scared mi off cos he suddenly came up and danced super close.. F**k him..

ok.. basically the updates are over..

Happy new year everyone!!

Had a discussion with him lately.. actually more like an argument.. was quite heated up till both of us nearly gave up.. cos its over the same issues again..

But he kind of enlightened mi on my behaviour.. i need to be more tolerant on this issues, he was right afterall. All this while, i didnt realise that i play a part in it.. but now i do.. so yea, after tt talk, i think we moved onto a new level..

right now, i realli am being more open and our r/s is no longer so tight and stress.. =)

well..

he's out now, leaving mi all alone in his place.. he bought his itouch so i am playing wif it now!

i hope to get a psp soon.. so i can be occupied when he's not around..plus i realli wanna play loco roco! haha.. anyone has cheap lobangs!

and..

being so bored.. i drew this..

haha! and i set as his wallpaper!! muahaha.. evils..

I am back.. =)

I just spent the last few weeks organising my room, clearing out old furnitures, putting in new furnitures.. and not to say spent a whole lot of money.. but its all worth it.. cos i really love my room now.. =)

Wednesday was his birthday.. Nth much this year cos we both agreed on not to spend lavishly on each other.. so i just bought a small cake from Angie the choice and i did a card for him.. All within an hour.. as i was pretty busy wif my work for the past few weeks..

Brought him to Coastes at Sentosa to try the pizza and relax by the beach. Followed by a dinner treat at Sushi Tei.. At night was partying at Plush with the usual clique.. Plush is so much like Momo!!! n i am seriously loving it alot!! I think it will be my next hang out place.. The decor is nice as usual with cages in the middle for daring ppl to dance haha..

Not much in the mood to dance tt night, mayb i am more used to a smaller grp now.. But its still fun! =)

Today, spend the whole day at home organising my wardroube while Yanling n Huizhen was messing things up in my kitchen.. They are baking brownies, cookies and making cheesecake at my place.. of cos i did help them out cos they dont really know how to do it.. lol.. =p
Cleared out some of my clothes for them..

Some things happened at home, kind of feel dull and i might not have free time to myself anymore.. Sometimes i always wonder why such things have to happen to me.. But of cos its my life so i have to do something to improve on it.. As usual i wont be pull down by this.. On a sad note.. my mom's health is deteriorating.. Haiz.. and my brother isnt helping the least at all..

Tml there would be a talking session with him.. I hope i get the message clear into his bloody head if not i will be damn pissed i am gonna throw him out from the house!

ok.. its a little extreme but i just wanna vent my anger out.. Grrr..

Lastly, I want my hair to grow FASTER!! =)

hehe..
just back.. met up wif Rebec, Meow, Dan n Kc.. Bec did a really beautiful scrap book for my bday gift! Thanks alot girl.. =) i can see the amt of effort she put into it.. had dinner at pepper lunch.. then went to catch the movie "The Ferryman"

Its about this man who cheated death over a thousand of years.. how he does it? He transfer his soul from bodies to bodies using a knife! So whenever he sees a body that he likes, he just have to stab the body using tt knife.. ya... like tt.. very bloody n gory.. so ppl who like to see tt.. ok go for it.. lol..

Nice meeting up wif them.. =) Yesterday, i met up wif Agnes, Yenling n Karin at Vivo then mi and Agnes went into sentosa.. i brought her to Fish Reflexology.. as her birthday gift.. afterwards we had our foot massage.. hehe.. nice place.. great company.. =) She and lz got mi the bag that i wanted to get for mths.. Thanks alot girls..
Afterwards was Lucas Ah ma's 80th birthday celebration at the Jurong Spring CC.. Even the PAP GRC ppl came.. -_- haha.. Then both of us went to catch a midnight movie.. The Seeker.. Not as nice as i expected.. But its great.. Cos its just the two of us.. simply yet fulfilling.. =)

Last fri was department Teambuilding day at sentosa.. Had lotsa fun tt day! Running about.. I was in the same team wif Simon, Apol, Jason, Shawn, Rahman, Annette.. Hehe.. Simon said he dont want to be in the same group as mi ever again cos i keep running non-stop. He says my stamina like never ending.. Well, when u have fun, and u want to win, u will do the best ma.. hehe..

Dinner was at Rasa Sentosa Resort, International Buffet.. Yummi! But not quite up to my expectations though.. lol..

Ok.. Time to head to bed.. more updates soon! =)

ok.. i am back..

some tots are running thru my mind now..

Recently, one of my close frens just broke up wif his gf.. i find myself thinking if i should step out since i dont see a future.. Mayb i am old enough.. i know wat i want in a partner..

While most couple have problems bcos they keep quarreling..

But i feel that the thing standing betw us is his lifestyles, his way of handling r/s be it bgr or frens..

U definitely wont see mi settling down wif someone whu always drinks till late at night, and i have to stay home to wait for him to get back..

and i dont want to be worrying all day and night if he has another girl outside.. it happened before and i dont want it to happen again..

i found out more abt myself.. i can live without a guy in my life.. so in a blunt way, i told him i can do well with or without u in my life..

But i dont mean anything now.. i just want to let him know now.. bcos one day i might just get fed up and walk away without saying any word..